I have written about myself, my family till now...Felt should write about Amit too... As I have said, this blog is about me, my family, people I love.. So it would be incomplete if I don't write anything about him...Actually, I was waiting for the right moment... What right moment you ask? There's no right/wrong moment when a loved one is concerned...I had planned to write something on a special day… What’s so special about today?? There is... Hold your breath....
Today is our 23rd anniversary !!! Not yearly !!! Hey, we are not that old !!! Its our monthly anniversary !!! he he!!! That too of coming across each other on Orkut (God bless the site)... Next month we are going to complete two years.... Two WONDERFUL years...
It all started on July 8, 2006, when I had scrapped him the first time..I had found him on a schoolmate's friend list... I was so excited to come across old friends & familiar names that I scrapped all of them... Amit fell in the category of “familiar names”... Believe it or not, we had never ever interacted, not even exchanged "Hello Hi's" !!! In school he was the typical studious guy, totally focused on his studies and career… And me?? Ahem... lets not get into that !!!! Being one of the toppers, everyone knew him by name, even my mom !!!... Whenever results came out, she used to ask "How much has .............. got?" She used to name the toppers in each & every section one by one & of course Amit was one of them... If I had scored 85% I used to manipulate a little and used to tell her that "Mom this time results were not good, even Amit has got 88%" !!! (Please note that the figures are just an example !!!)
Coming back to our story - He scrapped back & got into multi scrapping and three days later we graduated from Orkut & started mailing each other....Orkut was becoming too public and the page full of scraps would have raised a few eyebrows !!! The number of mails that crisscrossed were amazing, seems unreal now but at that point it felt like there was so much to know about each other, so much to share & mails being the only medium...I forgot to mention (how could I ?!!) that he was in US then...so there was the problem of different time zones, yet we managed... I used to stay up late just to read his mails & then reply back, same for him.... We started chatting...but that was only possible when I was at office and he was at home & that went on till late hours in the night for him...He had to get up early and rush to office red eyed the next day.. poor dear!!! We were already having sleepless nights!! he he!!
I remember we spoke for the first time on his birthday... I had called him up but got his voicemail instead ("Hi, you have reached Amit.. I can't take your call right now. Please leave a message, I will get back to you as soon as possible"- Awwww... How I used to hate it !!! ) As true as his voicemail message, he called up later to get his birthday wish!!! After that, phone calls, mails, chats became a habit.. Exchanging what was going on in our lives, however mundane or silly it might be, fears, insecurities, problems, and happy things... in short- anything.... The days when he could not mail or call (that was only due to unavoidable circumstances) it felt as if there was a void.... Don't know how & when we had become emotionally attached... It felt weird at times... Is it possible without even seeing each other? We hadn't even a clue where the other had been, what the other had been doing the past 10 years...Just had to take the other's word for it...How can you trust someone so much?? But we did... What if this attachment was only due to the fact that he was there all alone & my mails and phone calls etc was like a welcome change?? Would things be the same once he's back in India, amongst friends & family?? There were lots of confusions of which we had no answers except - "Time will tell".
As if these confusions weren’t enough, we faced a problem - my parents were looking for a groom for me... We were scared that this thing we are getting used to won't be the same once I get married... We used to dread that...One day a family came to see me.. It was one of the worst days of my life... The ending wasn't that bad though... The family came, ate, asked questions... “I HATED every moment of it” would be an understatement... coz I didn't want to be a part of that, yet wasn't so confident about our thing - where we stood exactly...couldn't be rude for fear of insulting my parents.. Amidst all this, got the mail alert in my cell... (not to miss any of his mails I had set a mail alert in my cell).. I was so eager to read the mail but somehow controlled myself... When they left (finally) I read the mail in which he had set all my doubts at rest... In the mail he asked me to marry him... There were no second thoughts, I said yes immediately !!!
But problems never seem to cease... next part was telling my parents... coz the family which had come were almost ready... Amit wasn't sure when he would be able to come back...So things had to be stalled at my place... I told them about us & to wait for 6 months... I really thank God for such wonderful parents... They just stalled everything and waited... Even though we hadn't met we had decided to take that risk... Coz once parents come to know about it there's not turning back...
Life was going on with the hope that he would be able to come back by July 2007 .. Everything was almost confirmed when one fine day we came to know that it wasn't possible, he would have to stay back till God (and his company) knows when... It felt as if the hope you were clinging to had been suddenly taken away...I was shattered, what would I tell my parents?? What time frame could I give them?? But I had to update them... People began to feel a bit impatient at my place, they started saying "So what if he can't come right now he should tell his parents about this".... But that was something we were very firm on... this is not something you should convey over the phone... If my kids would have done this I wouldn't have liked it... so the wait & the tension continued...Each and every day I kept on asking him -" When are you coming back? Any developments? " One day he told me if there would be any developments I would be the first person to know... So by asking him daily I was not trusting him... I realized my mistake & stopped doing that....
After many problems at his end - threats bordering on resignation, refusing lucrative offers... he came back in Jan 2008... Even though coming back in Jan cost him quite a lot (damn the tax laws, excuse the language !!!), but he came back.... I don't know whether I am worth all this... it was a gamble on his part... it is still a gamble though... One of my worst fears is him saying that it was all a mistake....I hope I don't have to hear that in my lifetime...
And then, WE MET !!! After one and half years of knowing, writing, talking to each other, seeing each other in pics….It was a different experience & and the fears "Whether things will change after we meet?" were dispelled.... But life is not as rosy as we expect it to be... next part was telling his parents & when he did, they were shocked... Maybe they wanted a much better match for their son.. don't blame them.. Age was also a factor.. Again came a tough time - he had to fight at his place, which he had never done before...This is not the way I wanted it, but that's the way God wants it to be... Who am I to question God’s will…so be it....Finally after much anguish, things have settled down, at least on the surface.... Maybe his parents have reconciled to the fact that there's nothing to be done... but just to go along....
As they say - All’s well that ends well... lets hope so.... There have been so many doubts -people becoming skeptical after hearing how it all happened.. Someone termed it as "phoney" (might have intended it as a pun, coz our major interaction was over the phone ) !!! A friend of mine asked, "Does this thing can really happen - over the net, phone calls?" I told her it happened in my life & thus I believe in it…
Even though we were far apart, we were always in touch, always updated on what’s going on in each other’s lives... Even though he was far away he was there with me in times of need... Even over the phone he could sense my mood, whenever I was down he would cheer me up.. He could see my tears even though I tried to hide them.... What else could a girl want? Even people living together miss out on these things....To be very frank, there are times when you miss the physical presence - When u feel like going out and all your friends are busy...When you want to talk to him, but due to network problem you cant get through... Or when you are not just content with hearing the voice, but want to see the expression, the smile, and the twinkle in the eye...
They say marriages are made in heaven, but can be made in internet too!!! Only thing is, you have to be lucky as I have been... Lucky to find him - someone without whom my life would have been incomplete.... He's one of the best people I have come across in my life, someone who has never ever let me down...Been as caring, thoughtful and understanding as I had wanted my life partner to be...We do have our differences and imperfections, but we have accepted those and loved each other... That is what Love is all about, isn’t it???
Today is our 23rd anniversary !!! Not yearly !!! Hey, we are not that old !!! Its our monthly anniversary !!! he he!!! That too of coming across each other on Orkut (God bless the site)... Next month we are going to complete two years.... Two WONDERFUL years...
It all started on July 8, 2006, when I had scrapped him the first time..I had found him on a schoolmate's friend list... I was so excited to come across old friends & familiar names that I scrapped all of them... Amit fell in the category of “familiar names”... Believe it or not, we had never ever interacted, not even exchanged "Hello Hi's" !!! In school he was the typical studious guy, totally focused on his studies and career… And me?? Ahem... lets not get into that !!!! Being one of the toppers, everyone knew him by name, even my mom !!!... Whenever results came out, she used to ask "How much has .............. got?" She used to name the toppers in each & every section one by one & of course Amit was one of them... If I had scored 85% I used to manipulate a little and used to tell her that "Mom this time results were not good, even Amit has got 88%" !!! (Please note that the figures are just an example !!!)
Coming back to our story - He scrapped back & got into multi scrapping and three days later we graduated from Orkut & started mailing each other....Orkut was becoming too public and the page full of scraps would have raised a few eyebrows !!! The number of mails that crisscrossed were amazing, seems unreal now but at that point it felt like there was so much to know about each other, so much to share & mails being the only medium...I forgot to mention (how could I ?!!) that he was in US then...so there was the problem of different time zones, yet we managed... I used to stay up late just to read his mails & then reply back, same for him.... We started chatting...but that was only possible when I was at office and he was at home & that went on till late hours in the night for him...He had to get up early and rush to office red eyed the next day.. poor dear!!! We were already having sleepless nights!! he he!!
I remember we spoke for the first time on his birthday... I had called him up but got his voicemail instead ("Hi, you have reached Amit.. I can't take your call right now. Please leave a message, I will get back to you as soon as possible"- Awwww... How I used to hate it !!! ) As true as his voicemail message, he called up later to get his birthday wish!!! After that, phone calls, mails, chats became a habit.. Exchanging what was going on in our lives, however mundane or silly it might be, fears, insecurities, problems, and happy things... in short- anything.... The days when he could not mail or call (that was only due to unavoidable circumstances) it felt as if there was a void.... Don't know how & when we had become emotionally attached... It felt weird at times... Is it possible without even seeing each other? We hadn't even a clue where the other had been, what the other had been doing the past 10 years...Just had to take the other's word for it...How can you trust someone so much?? But we did... What if this attachment was only due to the fact that he was there all alone & my mails and phone calls etc was like a welcome change?? Would things be the same once he's back in India, amongst friends & family?? There were lots of confusions of which we had no answers except - "Time will tell".
As if these confusions weren’t enough, we faced a problem - my parents were looking for a groom for me... We were scared that this thing we are getting used to won't be the same once I get married... We used to dread that...One day a family came to see me.. It was one of the worst days of my life... The ending wasn't that bad though... The family came, ate, asked questions... “I HATED every moment of it” would be an understatement... coz I didn't want to be a part of that, yet wasn't so confident about our thing - where we stood exactly...couldn't be rude for fear of insulting my parents.. Amidst all this, got the mail alert in my cell... (not to miss any of his mails I had set a mail alert in my cell).. I was so eager to read the mail but somehow controlled myself... When they left (finally) I read the mail in which he had set all my doubts at rest... In the mail he asked me to marry him... There were no second thoughts, I said yes immediately !!!
But problems never seem to cease... next part was telling my parents... coz the family which had come were almost ready... Amit wasn't sure when he would be able to come back...So things had to be stalled at my place... I told them about us & to wait for 6 months... I really thank God for such wonderful parents... They just stalled everything and waited... Even though we hadn't met we had decided to take that risk... Coz once parents come to know about it there's not turning back...
Life was going on with the hope that he would be able to come back by July 2007 .. Everything was almost confirmed when one fine day we came to know that it wasn't possible, he would have to stay back till God (and his company) knows when... It felt as if the hope you were clinging to had been suddenly taken away...I was shattered, what would I tell my parents?? What time frame could I give them?? But I had to update them... People began to feel a bit impatient at my place, they started saying "So what if he can't come right now he should tell his parents about this".... But that was something we were very firm on... this is not something you should convey over the phone... If my kids would have done this I wouldn't have liked it... so the wait & the tension continued...Each and every day I kept on asking him -" When are you coming back? Any developments? " One day he told me if there would be any developments I would be the first person to know... So by asking him daily I was not trusting him... I realized my mistake & stopped doing that....
After many problems at his end - threats bordering on resignation, refusing lucrative offers... he came back in Jan 2008... Even though coming back in Jan cost him quite a lot (damn the tax laws, excuse the language !!!), but he came back.... I don't know whether I am worth all this... it was a gamble on his part... it is still a gamble though... One of my worst fears is him saying that it was all a mistake....I hope I don't have to hear that in my lifetime...
And then, WE MET !!! After one and half years of knowing, writing, talking to each other, seeing each other in pics….It was a different experience & and the fears "Whether things will change after we meet?" were dispelled.... But life is not as rosy as we expect it to be... next part was telling his parents & when he did, they were shocked... Maybe they wanted a much better match for their son.. don't blame them.. Age was also a factor.. Again came a tough time - he had to fight at his place, which he had never done before...This is not the way I wanted it, but that's the way God wants it to be... Who am I to question God’s will…so be it....Finally after much anguish, things have settled down, at least on the surface.... Maybe his parents have reconciled to the fact that there's nothing to be done... but just to go along....
As they say - All’s well that ends well... lets hope so.... There have been so many doubts -people becoming skeptical after hearing how it all happened.. Someone termed it as "phoney" (might have intended it as a pun, coz our major interaction was over the phone ) !!! A friend of mine asked, "Does this thing can really happen - over the net, phone calls?" I told her it happened in my life & thus I believe in it…
Even though we were far apart, we were always in touch, always updated on what’s going on in each other’s lives... Even though he was far away he was there with me in times of need... Even over the phone he could sense my mood, whenever I was down he would cheer me up.. He could see my tears even though I tried to hide them.... What else could a girl want? Even people living together miss out on these things....To be very frank, there are times when you miss the physical presence - When u feel like going out and all your friends are busy...When you want to talk to him, but due to network problem you cant get through... Or when you are not just content with hearing the voice, but want to see the expression, the smile, and the twinkle in the eye...
They say marriages are made in heaven, but can be made in internet too!!! Only thing is, you have to be lucky as I have been... Lucky to find him - someone without whom my life would have been incomplete.... He's one of the best people I have come across in my life, someone who has never ever let me down...Been as caring, thoughtful and understanding as I had wanted my life partner to be...We do have our differences and imperfections, but we have accepted those and loved each other... That is what Love is all about, isn’t it???
It sometimes feels too good to be true... it can't be happening to me... I don't think I deserve this...And if it’s a dream, don't want to wake up, ever...
1 comment:
Hello,
Nice Blog...Keep Going.
I like the pictures...and also post.
You must check this blob
www.pgkut.co.cc
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